27th Sunday, October 4, 2009
The Creation of Wives
At Sunday school they were teaching how God created everything, including human beings. Little Johnny seemed especially intent when they told him how Eve was created out of one of Adam's ribs. Later in the week his mother noticed him lying down as though he were ill, and said, "Johnny, what is the matter?"
Little Johnny responded, "I have pain in my side. I think I'm going to have a wife."
One woman says to another, "Isn't your wedding ring on the wrong finger?" The other woman replies, "Why, yes, it is. I married the wrong man"!
A woman was telling her friend, "It is I who made my husband a millionaire." "And what was he before you married him?" asked the friend. The woman replied "A billionaire."
I never married because there was no need. I have 3 pets at home which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog that growls every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night.
In the beginning, God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone. So the Lord took one of the ribs of Adam and he made into a woman and brought her to the man. Then the man said, ‘This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; this one shall be called Woman, for out of Man this one was taken.’ Therefore a man leaves his father and his mother and clings to his wife and they become one flesh.” In marriage, the man and the woman become one. They belong to each other. The union between a man and a woman in the Sacrament of Marriage is compared to the union between Christ and the Church. Marriage, from where this priest watches, is the mutual commitment to assist God in the on-going creation of each other. Divorce is the un-creating of this sacred design. God’s continuing creation is a sacred labor and divorce is the acceptance that somehow the sacredness was put aside. Human beings get married to reveal their love for each other. God blesses that marriage to reveal God’s love for us all. May no one divide!
Today’s Gospel, quoting from the Creation story in Genesis, says that a married couple are no longer two persons but “one body”. To develop that kind of two-becomes-one relationship requires a lot of work. It also require a lot of guidance from experienced people… other married couples and counselors. Probably a major cause of breakdown today is that so many so-called ‘nuclear’ families live without any real outside support from the wider family or community. When things get rough, there can be a terrible loneliness with no one to turn to. In our Christian parish communities we could do a lot to be sensitive to strains in families we know and see that such families do have sympathetic and understanding people to turn to. Jesus' reply underlines two important points.
First point, Jesus treats the woman as a person. Some earlier Jewish tradition regarded the woman more or less as property of the man to be disposed of at will. In fact, here for the first time in Jewish literature we hear not just of the man divorcing the woman but also of the woman taking the initiative to divorce the man (verse 12). Jesus treats the woman as a legal person of equal standing with the man. Second point, Jesus is interested in teaching not legal statements but moral principles. They asked him whether divorce was permissible, his reply was that the mind of God is for husband and wife never to divorce. The asked him about what was lawful, he told them what was best for them. They asked him about a legal position and he told them the divine provision. They asked what was possible and he told them what the ideal was. They asked what they could do or not do and he told them they should always aim at. They asked about what was lawful and he taught them what was best for them. For in Christ "All things are lawful, but not all things are helpful. All things are lawful, but not all things build up" (1 Corinthians 10:23).
Jesus stresses the importance of marriage because in marriage, man and woman become one. They belong to each other. The union between a man and a woman in the Sacrament of Marriage is compared to the union between Christ and the Church.
”Husbands must love their wives just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, to make her holy by cleansing her with the washing of water by the word, so as to present the church to himself in splendor, without a spot or wrinkle so that she may be holy and without blemish. In the same way, husbands should love their wives as they do their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hates his own body, but he nourishes and tenderly cares for it, just as Christ does for the church, because we are members of the body. For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”
Today Jesus presents man and woman as having equal rights. He also presents marriage as essentially a permanent relationship: “The two shall become one body… What God has united, man must not divide.
” This implies total unity, equality and a permanent mutuality of giving.
Divorce was permitted by Jewish law and it could be had simply by a husband delivering a certificate declaring his intention to divorce his wife, giving freedom to both to remarry. Among Catholics, one of the most sensitive and often-avoided topics is the stinging reality of divorce and its consequences. While there must be a pastoral response to assist those parties who seek counseling when their failed marriage ends in divorce, one must never compromise the truth of Christ’s teachings for the sake of the pastoral response. The words and teachings of Jesus Christ on divorce are clear, and it is the responsibility of the Church and its pastors to safeguard, proclaim, and defend them. We therefore, turn our attention to the words of Christ Himself recorded in the Gospel of Matthew when the Pharisees ask him the question: “Is it lawful to divorce one’s wife for any cause?” He tells them that He who made them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one”. So they are no longer two but one. What therefore God has joined together, let not man put asunder.’ This is how Jesus speaks of the unity in the family as it is the creative plan of God and no one can break this plan of his.
